I procrastinated a lot, but here it is: a detailed account of the first month or so...
Ground Zero - February 28, 2006Ji calls me up out of the blue and tells me that Phil found a cat by the lake. I’d been thinking about getting a cat for a few months now, but I’d given up because I just couldn’t find one. Do I want it? Do I want it NOW?
Day 1I decide to keep her and end up bringing her home right after taking her to the vet and buying some supplies. She’s scared as hell and stays under the bed the entire time.
I dub her Mia, as in Mamma Mia.
Day 2It’s the first day of classes, so I have to go to work, not knowing if I’ll come home to find my couch shredded to pieces. I half-expect a huge pile of crap on my bed to welcome me. Fortunately, I return to find her still under the bed. I like this cat already.
Day 3I end up spending $40 on more supplies and another $40 on just food. I only spend $100 a month on just my own food and I’m at least 20 times her weight. How does that work?
She finally ventures out from the land down under (my bed), but is still deathly afraid of my horrifying tilt-and-swivel action rolling computer chair.
Day 5I’ve been letting her sleep on my bed since she seemed to like it. But I couldn’t move around freely and she kept waking me up all the time by walking all over me, so I stopped. Now I just kick her off.
She likes sitting on top of the radiator staring out the window, 12 stories above the ground. I bet it gives her a sense of power.
Day 7I begin to wonder if she’ll give birth soon, since she’s inhaling all her food and her belly has expanded an extra 30% of its previous size. She can’t even clean her own butt. (FYI for all you non-cat people, cats lick their own buttholes when they clean themselves. Elegant, I know.)
Day 9I can’t stand it anymore. Her #2’s are stinkbombs. Sure, she may have an excuse that she can’t reach her own butt since she’s pregnant, but come on…it’s like she takes a huge dump in the litter box and then kicks it around just to spread the smell through the house.
Day 11I’m playing my computer when she starts yowling. It’s the kind of shrieking noises one makes when they’re getting butt-pierced. I get the thought that she may be going into labor, so I peek under the bed and watch her for a while. I studied up on the whole cat pregnancy process, so I knew she’d go to a dark, quiet, comfortable place, break some fluid, and start popping them out. But there was no fluid and she stopped after a while and just sat there.
Three hours later I need to take a bathroom break from gaming. I walk into the bathroom to see Mia lying in the litter box with 5 (count ‘em FIVE) mini-Mia’s. WTF?! She gave birth and I didn’t even know?! She didn’t even make a sound! And FIVE? The vet said she only had two in her! …and why would she do it in the litter box...that’s just plain nasty…
Given that this was a week early, I frantically scour the internet for any tips on post-natal care. After a few hours of research, I conclude that I have to do basically nothing. I like that kind of conclusion.
Day 12The kittens look the same as yesterday. Little balls of fur that look more like mice, with a single-minded purpose just to feed. They just lay there. And feed. Sometimes they make pathetic mewling sounds.
I try to move them to a box in the hallway, since Mia’s going to need the litter box to do her business. She goes ape and returns to the bathroom, kitten in tow, desperately searching for the litter box. So I let her keep it.
Day 14I come home to find a huge steaming pile of crap on my bed. The juices had soaked right through the sheets and comforter, all the way down into the mattress. Wonderful. I guess you can’t blame her for holding it in for 3 days. But still…why the bed?
I forcibly remove her from her litter box home and give her a basket with blankets in it. She still wants to stay in the bathroom though, so I stick it in there along with all the kitties.
Day 16Tragedy strikes. I come home to find a bloody mess in the box. Half of a kitten lies broken on the blanket. All five kittens are still there, so this must have been the sixth that never came out. I can only guess that it was a miscarriage. Now that I think about it, she did seem to have a bit too big of a belly after giving birth. Sad…
Day 18One of the kittens finally opened his eyes. I have to admit that they’re cute when their eyes are shut so tightly, but they’re even cuter when they’re opened. I think about naming this guy something related to be being first, smart, or first-to-develop. He’s also the runt who gets batted away by the stronger ones during feeding time.
Day 21They’ve started to play with each other, nibbling on each other’s legs and bapping each other’s faces with their paws. So cute! They’ve gotten really active, trying to sit up and stand without falling over. Most of the times they manage to get themselves up, but tip over at the faintest breeze.
Day 23I make first contact with the kittens with Mia watching. (The previous times I’ve handled them were while I was distracting her.) She seemed pretty apprehensive and continuously murmured at me. (She can’t really growl, but can’t really meow. It kinda sounds like a retarded grunt.)
Day 25We are mobile! One of the kittens has taken his first step into the outside world. I found him behind the toilet, exploring the new frontier, seeking out strange new worlds and civilizations.
Day 27It’s so funny watching Mia clean them. They cry and try to get away, but she holds them down with one paw and just licks away. Sometimes she bathes them with such fervor that they flop right out of the bed. ^^ What’s nasty though, is that she also has to lick their butts to stimulate their bowel movements. What's even worse, is that right after, she licks their face!
Day 30The brave explorer kitty ventures forth onto my feet, digging his claws in mercilessly. It hurts like crazy, but then he sniffs all over and the tickling overwhelms me. Mia is much more concerned than he is. She keeps staring me down and grunting, “What do you think you’re doing with my child?”
Day 32Their play fighting is hilarious. The aggressive one gets so into beating down the runt that he goes into a rage. He pretty much loses all finesse and just bites anything that moves. Including himself. He mistakes his own leg for another’s and just starts chomping down without hesitation. He still annoys me though, as he bullies the others out of their feeding and takes up so much space that the runt can’t get in.
Day 35She finally moved to the hallway. I had set out a nice big cardboard box with a pile of soft clothes in a nice dark area, but she had always refused to move out of the bathroom. I guess she finally got tired of me turning on the light and waking her up and disturbing the kitties. Or maybe it was my #2’s that finally smoked her out. Revenge, haha!
Day 38She moved the whole family from the hallway to under my bed. I have no idea why. It’s cold and uncomfortable down there.
Day 39The kitties have gone crazy exploring the new territory. They’re especially interested in ripping my schoolwork to shreds. They’ve gotten more active, but more cautious as well. Strange noises from my ever-frightening computer chair drive them back under the bed in a split second. Sounds from my neighbors also make them jump.
Day 41She moved them all back to the box, I dunno why. They’ve also started trying to eat her food, but don’t yet have the strength to chew it. The runt started hacking on it, but luckily spit it out. I’ve raised the food bowl to a higher place. But then while Mia was eating, she tipped it over, and it was like a piñata had just gotten smashed open in front of a pack of wild-eyed sugar-craving 6-year-olds. I have to think of something better.
